


Boner Squad, Assemble

by Alexilulu



Category: Persona 5, Persona Series
Genre: Angst and Fluff and Smut, Bath Houses, Blow Jobs, Hurt/Comfort, Multi, Spitroasting, Vaginal Sex, post-interrogation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-04
Updated: 2018-02-04
Packaged: 2019-03-13 17:14:18
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,624
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13575201
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alexilulu/pseuds/Alexilulu
Summary: When depression takes Joker, who better to lift him up but his blonde partners in crime? (Explicit only in chapter 2)





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [RetroKinetic](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=RetroKinetic).



> Birthday gift for RetroKinetic AKA bufudeeznuts AKA Matador's Wife AKA Boner Squad Leader AKA cool person.

“Hey, boss.” Ryuji waves to Sojiro as he walks into Leblanc, smirking. Ann trails not far behind him, rattling her umbrella under the awning outside to clear the rain from it.

“Hey, kid. Thanks for coming.” Sojiro continues polishing the coffee cup he’s holding, nodding upstairs. “I haven’t heard a peep from him all day. Brought some curry up earlier, but he was asleep. If he hasn’t eaten, there’s leftovers from today in the fridge. Just don’t burn the place down, alright?” Ann steps in at last, closing the door and flipping the sign to Closed behind her.

“Got it. No fires.” Sojiro raises an eyebrow at Ryuji, then looks to Ann, who sighs.

“I’ll keep him away from the oven.”

Sojiro nods. “Thanks. You kids…take good care of him.” He sets down his cup, untying his apron and searching for his hat under the cabinets.

Upstairs, the room is an absolute disaster; magazines, clothes, bits of debris and garbage and infiltration tools are scattered everywhere; there’s a lockpick sticking out of a half-eaten tub of Jagariko, and a pile of smoke bombs shoved into the corner half-shrouded by one of Ryuji’s shirts. On the bed, Morgana sleeps at the foot of a mountain formed by a dozen hand-me-down, threadbare blankets, out of which a mop of curly black hair emerges. Akira’s staring straight ahead out of it, looking towards the stairway, but doesn’t acknowledge their presence.

“Holy crap, dude.” Ryuji starts picking up garbage as he walks through the room, bundling it into his arms. “It’s only been like...5 days.”

Ann keeps walking past him, sitting down on the edge of the bed and reaching out a hand to pat Akira’s hair. “Hey, babe, you in there?” The oil that’s built up in his hair clings to her hand, and she absentmindedly wipes it on the blanket. “Earth to Akira...C’mon, you’re not dead, talk to me.”

Akira groans in response, blinking slowly and shifting under the blanket. “Mhhhhhhh.”

“None of that. C’mon, time to get up. It’s…” She checks her phone, grimacing. “6 in the afternoon. C’mon, when was the last time you had a bath? Let’s go, up up _up_!” She pulls the top blanket off, casting it over the still-sleeping form of Morgana. “I’m just gonna keep taking em off until you freeze, you know.”

“C’mon, give the poor guy a minute, he just got his ass kicked, he probably still hurts like crazy.”

Ann rips off another layer of blankets with a flourish. “All the more reason to get up, the bath house next door is doing a special bath today for that kind of stuff!”

Akira groans, a hand emerging from the blankets to rub his face. “It’s Monday?”

Ryuji sits down next to Ann, the bundle of garbage he collected at his feet. “It’s Thursday, dude. Boss says you wouldn’t talk to him, just eat and lay in bed.” He sighs, running a hand through his hair. “I’m not sayin’ I got it as bad as you did in there, but...I know how bad it can be, getting worked over like that. Not to mention that fuck Akechi...Whatever. He’s not important. What’s important is you can’t let yourself stop just because of this. Y’gotta keep moving, you know?” He sniffs, then grimaces. “Also, you reek.”

Ann looks shocked at Ryuji’s little speech. “That...was surprisingly good advice, right up until the end. Good job, Ryuji.” He chuckles, looking away and blushing.

“C’mon, let’s just get him up and over to the bath.” They both stand, ripping the last of the blankets from the bed. Akira shivers and starts to get out of bed, and falters as he tries to stand, only to get caught by the both of them, throwing his arms over each of their shoulders. “Take it slow, we got you.”

* * *

 

Ryuji sighs, sinking into the medicated bath next to Akira. “Ohh, that’s the ticket.” Akira sinks lower, covering the lower half of his face with the water and stretching out his legs across the empty bath. Ryuji looks over at him and snorts, smiling. “You’re such a kid sometimes, man.” They both look to the door when it slides open, eyebrows going up when Ann walks in with a towel over her hair and wrapped around her body. “Hey hey hey, what the hell are you doing?!”

“Oh my god, calm down. I slipped the attendant a little something to close early, so we’re the only ones here.” She walks over, abandoning her towel and sliding into the water across from them. “We all know you’ve seen me naked already, too, I don’t know why you’re being so weird. And it’s not like that stupid cat-suit leaves much to the imagination, anyway.”

Akira starts blowing bubbles in the water as Ryuji sputters and looks away from Ann, blushing.“This is different! This is like...some weird manga bullshit, not us...uhh…” His blush intensifies as Akira emerges from the water, his arm snaking around Ryuji’s shoulders.

“Tell me about what you two were doing. Please.”

“Uhh, I--Well, y’see, it--”

Ann rolls her eyes, crossing her arms over her chest. “We made out at my place and he touched a boob, and now he can’t look me in the eye, soooo I’ve been antagonizing him alllllll day. It’s pretty fun, actually.”

“Wait, all that today was _on purpose_? You said you tripping me and then falling on top of me was an accident, and the tongue stuff you kept doing was just a nervous tic!” He looks incredulously over at Akira when he hears his quiet laughter in his ear. “And what the hell are you doin’ touchin’ me, we’re in the bath!”

Akira leans closer, voice a dangerous purr that Ryuji usually only hears in the Metaverse, behind the Joker mask. “ _You’re_ the one who sat down 6 inches from me in the bath, Ryuji. Is Ann not enough for you? Truly, the reach of Boner Squad knows no bounds...”

Ann bursts into laughter when Akira mentions Ryuji’s terrible team name idea from all those months ago. “Oh my god, Boner Squad, we really should have gone with that one.”

“S-shut up! I got put on the spot, and then--”

“You know, speaking of boners…” Ryuji looks away from Akira and finds Ann on the other side of him, smirking mischievously.

“We’ll just have to take care of that, won’t we, Ann?”

Ryuji groans, closing his eyes as his partners descend upon him. It’s gonna be a long night.


	2. The X Rated Bit

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> uhhhhhhhhhhhh, my hand slipped and then this came out?

“Okay, ohhh, ok, stop, shit…” Ryuji shoves himself further back against the wall at the bottom of the stairwell, panting for breath. Akira stands just inches away, watching him with look that is much more hungry than tired, but the bags under his eyes show the truth of the matter. “First the bath, then the  _ changing room _ , now here?” Ryuji tries to compose himself and catch his breath, relaxing against the wall.

“That was Ann in the changing room, I was just watching.” Ryuji rolls his eyes, huffing in exasperation.

“Not the point, dude! I don’t even know if I can go again yet, and you’re--” Akira steps closer, wrapping his arms around Ryuji’s waist and resting his face against Ryuji’s neck.

“I...missed you. That’s all.” Akira speaks into his neck, breathing softly against his skin. Ryuji closes his eyes, putting a hand on Akira’s back.

“...I did too. Sorry. I shoulda came sooner, I just--”

“Gay.” Ann interrupts from behind the both of them, tossing her still-damp hair over her shoulder in one solid mass of gold. “Or maybe you were waiting for me? Aww, how sweet. Come on, it’s freezing down here.” She walks past the both of them, Akira yelping into Ryuji’s shoulder when her hand squeezes Akira’s ass. Ryuji can’t help but laugh, until Akira gives him a death glare that makes him clam up. They follow her up, Akira unconsciously grabbing Ryuji’s hand as he goes up and leaning heavily on the railing with the other. 

All 3 of them sit down on the bed, which someone straightened up after they made a mess of it getting Akira out of his cocoon. Morgana? Futaba? The former seems to have disappeared, so he’s a likely candidate...but how does a cat make a bed?

Akira sits down between Ryuji and Ann, leaning softly on Ryuji’s shoulder for support. “So. Hungry?” Ann starts, bumping Akira with her shoulder.

“Yeah. Ravenous.” Ann nods, then reaches around him to shove Ryuji away and pull Akira towards her. “Okay, tough guy, go heat everybody up some curry. Don’t burn down the place, thanks.”

Ryuji pats Akira’s shoulder but grumbles as he stands, “...burn down  _ your _ place if you…” just barely audible as he walks downstairs. Once he’s out of eyeshot, Ann rubs Akira’s arm softly, leaning her head against his.

“Hey. I know you’re not doing great, but...you know we’re here for you, right?” Akira nods, the movement moving her head along with it. “And that we’d do anything for you? Like...we do crimes together, we’re like  _ really _ close, but we’d do, like,  _ anything _ for you. Y’know?” More nodding, and she can see his cheek twitch as he smiles. “Good. So stop being dumb and talk to us. Futaba’s gonna go ballistic if you keep pestering her, so rely on us a little, alright?”

“Yeah. Sorry.” She shifts, and Akira finds himself turned fully against her, leaning his head against her shoulder. One of her hands comes up, stroking his still-damp nest of hair gently.

“No sorries, either. You’re hurting, we’ve both been there. You didn’t do anything wrong. You’re still our Akira, ok? C”mon, look at me for a second.” Akira looks up, blinking away the blurriness in his eyes. Ann brushes hair out of his face, cupping his cheek. “We both love you, babe. So lay off yourself.” She kisses him gently, cupping his face with both hands. Akira’s hands slide under her shirt, and she exhales against his lips, leaning her chest against him.

“Oh my god, I leave for five minutes, and you gotta start without me?” Ryuji looms over both of them, bearing two gigantic plates of curry. Akira looks at Ryuji sidelong, frowning.

“Forget the curry, I’m not hungry anymore.” Akira nods towards the bed.

“Yeah, he’s thirsty again.” Ann chimes in, and squeals when he pinches her stomach under her shirt. “I’m right!”

Ryuji sighs, walking away to abandon the plates on the couch before returning, sitting down behind Ann. “I kinda figured after he went down on me in the bath, girl. Didn’t think he’d do it, but…”

“When did you go from being a horny guy to a baby prude, hon? Just wondering.” Ann’s speech is punctuated by soft inhalations when Akira returns kisses her neck. Ryuji reaches around her waist, unbuttoning her shirt slowly and grinning whenever Akira’s hands under her shirt brush against his on the other side of the material. Eventually, he takes the other side of Ann’s neck, following Akira’s lead and leaving a few marks with his teeth besides, to a chorus of Ann’s delighted whining when he does. Finally, Akira retreats to try to get out of his sweats, while Ryuji pulls Ann’s shirt off of her and starts working on her bra, popping it off with a small grunt of effort.

“God, I’ve missed you both.” Ann says, hiking up her skirt to slip out of her leggings. She crawls forward onto Akira’s legs, shoving him all the way onto his back and taking his cock in her hand, pumping it slowly and smiling at the way he covers his mouth but doesn’t take his eyes off her. “You smell so good, now...Could just eat you up.” She licks her lips for emphasis, and Akira shudders under her grip. 

Ann leans forward, running her tongue up the shaft and planting her lips on the tip with an exaggerating kissing sound, lifting her hips upwards towards Ryuji for emphasis. He responds with both hands slipping under her skirt, sliding across her ass aimlessly until one cups her mound, a finger slipping inside for a moment to test the waters. Her response is immediate, a moan with Akira’s cock in her mouth that vibrates it in a way that makes Akira gasp. Emboldened, Ryuji slips back inside, a second finger joining the first and making Ann’s hips shake with the rhythm of his hand. 

Ann pulls back, her hand pumping to keep Akira going while she turns back to Ryuji. “Come on, you baby, just get it out already!”

“I was tryin’ to be nice, jeez!” Ryuji sits up onto his knees, yanking his pants down to reveal his erection and pulls a condom from his pocket. 

“Time and a place, babe!” She turns back to Akira and rolls her eyes, and he stifles a laugh when she gasps mid-eyeroll as Ryuji pushes himself into her, grunting. “Haah, now we’re talking…” She returns to her task, twisting her hand on Akira’s shaft while Ryuji starts to move, drawing harsh sounds out of her throat with every movement. Before long, all three of them are panting for breath, clinging to each other. Akira reached out a hand to Ann, who took it with her free hand, and squeezes it tightly when he comes. Finally, she can feel Ryuji getting close, and releases Akira’s cock, leaning back with her other hand to take one of Ryuji’s, forming an unbroken chain of bodies as the last two links come one after the other, Ryuji bent over Ann squeezing his eyes shut while she calls out wordlessly with release.

When they break apart, they come back together in only moments. Ann moves to one side of Akira on the bed against the wall, and Ryuji returns to take the last square inch of bed remaining on the edge, tucking himself in under the pile of blankets covering all 3 of them. 

“I...really did miss you guys.” Akira first, sighing. “More than I knew how to express. Sorry.”

“Hey, I already said no apologies, so cut it out.” Ann flicks his hair, and Akira smiles.

“Right. I’ll text you guys tomorrow?”

“Well...about that. We were kinda gonna skip school tomorrow anyway before the Boss called, so…” Ryuji shrugs under the blanket. “We’ll just be here, no texting needed. Ann already told you we’d do anything for you, right?”

“Something like that. And you kind of...made that clear on your own, too.”

Ryuji blushes, burying his face in Akira’s shoulder. “C’mon, you talkin’ like that kills me, stoppppp.”

“I can’t believe how easy it is to get him embarrassed. Tough guy breaks when his boyfriend says he loves him.” Ann sighs. “Or when anyone says anything even vaguely suggestive at all. I’m learning new double entendres by the day now because of this one.” 

Akira laughs, shaking his head. “I love you two so much. I don’t know where I’d be without you.”

“Dead.” Ann chirps.

“Definitely dead. Or just mortally maimed in a ditch somewhere, bleeding very slowly to death.” Ryuji nods.

“Jesus, Ryuji, that’s dark.”

“You said he’d be dead first!” Ryuji reaches over Ann, shoving her shoulder.

“Yeah, but I said it as a joke, you didn’t have to agree with me!” Ann shoves back, and Akira closes his eyes, a smile on his lips.

They argue for a few more minutes, until they realize that Akira is sound asleep, one hand up on his chest. After a short apology, they both snuggle closer to him and settle in to sleep, each of them putting a hand over his, fingers linked.


End file.
